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An Auburn fan and an Alabama fan both go to Las Vegas to do a little gambling.
After a couple of hours the Alabama fan was broke. He looks over and sees the Auburn fan with a wheelbarrel full of quarters.
The Alabama fan walks over to him and says, "Wow, where did you win all that?"
To which the Auburn fan replies, "You see that machine on the wall over there? If you put a dollar in you get four quarters back every time!"
Two Auburn Engineering students were tasked to measure the height of a flag pole as a class assignment. They decided to measure the flag pole outside of Pat Dye Field at the south end of the stadium.
While attempting this task one student would hold the tape while the other climbed the flag pole with the other end of the tape. Much to their disappointment, the student climbing the pole kept sliding down and could not get to the top.
An astute Alabama graduate was observing from a distance and suggested that the Auburn students disconnect the flag pole and measure the pole while on the ground.
The Auburn students enraged by the suggestion yelled out " We want to know how tall it is not how long it is you idiot".
An Alabama and an Auburn cheerleader were each late for breakfast at cheerleading camp, so they had to eat cereal instead of a hot breakfast.
The Alabama cheerleader fixed her bowl of Cheerios and went to sit at a nearby table.
The Auburn cheerleader picked up the box and started to poor herself some, but suddenly stopped with a dumb look on her face.
The Alabama cheerleader asked her what was wrong, to which the Auburn cheerleader replied, "Nothing. I've just never seen doughnut seeds before!"
Alabama and auburn grad were on a plane. The auburn fan got bored and since he thought he would be so much smarter than the bama grad, so he woke him up and challenged him to a game
They would ask each other questions. For every question the bama grad missed, he would have to pay the auburn grad $5. For every question the auburn grad missed, he'd have to pay the bama grad $50. The bama grad agreed.
The auburn grad said he would go first since he was risking the most money.
The au grads question was, "how far is it from the earth to the moon"?
The bama grad thought for a minute and guessed, "150,000 miles".
"Ha!!!", said the au grad. "It is 238,900 miles".
The bama grad paid him $5.
The au grad said, "now it's your turn".
The bama grad thought for a minute and said, "what goes up a hill on 3 legs and down a hill on 4?"
The au grad thought...and pondered...and thought some more. He sat there for 30 minutes. Finally, he pulled out his wallet and handed the bama grad a $50 bill.
The bama grad said, "it's your turn".
The au grad thought for a while and said, "okay, this is killing me. What goes up a hill on 3 legs and down a hill on 4 legs?"
The bama grad pulls out a $5 bill, hands it to the au grad and says, "I don't know".
The bama grad turns back away and goes back to sleep.
"You feeling satisfied now Teddy?"
Losing doesn't make me want to quit. It makes me want to fight that much harder-Coach Paul "Bear" Bryant
Really old one:
Shug calls Coach Bryant and says, "Paul, I need some advice; I know you probably get gifts and whatnot from your boosters, but these farmers just keep sending me pigs and chickens. What do I do with them?" Coach Bryant repiles, "Hell, Shug, I don't know: why don't you take them to the zoo?" A couple of weeks later Coach Bryant and Shug run into each other at the Quarterback Club and Coach Bryant asks, "Shug, what did you ever do with those farm animals you asked me about?" Shug replies, "why Paul, that was a great idea about the zoo! We had so much fun we're going to Six Flags next week!"
Will Rogers never met Shug!
I know I'm dating myself, but my favorite Interstate graffiti; post UA/AU game, 1973; "Even VPI got 7"
The 2010 National Championship
Did you hear about the skeleton they found in a closet of the chemistry building at Auburn?
It's the 1932 hide-and-go-seek champion.
This post was edited by netny10 17 months ago
ALABAMA & auburn fan go in rest room to take a dump.
BAMA fan "Dam no toilte paper in my stall"
barn fan "none in mine either"
barner "what are we going to do?"
BAMA " do you have a dollar?"
BAMA " use it to wipe yourself "
barner comes out of his stall with crap all over his hand up to his elbow
BAMA " Did'nt you use your dollar?"
barner "Yes I did! used three quarters, two dimes & one nickle!
Never Forget ROLL TIDE ROLL!
This post was edited by ducky lee 17 months ago
Vince Lombardi was asked how it felt to have the best football team in the world. He replied, I don't know. We haven't played Alabama yet.
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