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The onion article on Bama winning the Bcs

  • A lot of y'all on here won't like this one, but I couldn't help but laugh at a few of the jokes.

    This might rival ticket city for the most down voted thread on BOL

    Unpopular BCS Crowns Alabama National Champio

    NEW ORLEANSDuring a postgame ceremony Monday in which the Bowl Championship Series controversially awarded the Alabama Crimson Tide the 2012 NCAA championship trophy...

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/unpopular-bcs-crowns-alabama-national-champions-en,27034/
  • Funny Stuff.....and yes alot of folks wont get it and call it stupid.

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  • The Onion used to be funny. I think they are just victims of their own success now and trying to fill space.

  • number3train said... (original post)

    The Onion used to be funny. I think they are just victims of their own success now and trying to fill space.

    Agreed. There is a lot in the BCS that could be fodder for good satire. They missed it.

  • Ashevillain said... (original post)

    A lot of y'all on here won't like this one, but I couldn't help but laugh at a few of the jokes.

    This might rival ticket city for the most down voted thread on BOL

    I typically enjoy the onion and their satire. However this isn't a very good satirical piece, in fact it just comes off a bit whiny.

    This post was edited by BamaAussie 2 years ago

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    Biggest Bama fan in Australia

  • CrimsonStain

    patrickricks said... (original post)

    Funny Stuff.....and yes alot of folks wont get it and call it stupid.

    Can someone copy / paste the article into the thread. Cant get access to the site. Thanks.

    This post was edited by CrimsonStain 2 years ago

    “Although our intellect always longs for clarity and certainty, our nature often finds uncertainty fascinating.” Karl von Clausewitz

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  • CrimsonStain said... (original post)

    Can someone copy / paste the article into the thread. Cant get access to the site. Thanks.

    I've always enjoyed The Onion, but this one missed the mark. Gotta be a young writer.

    Sports News
    Unpopular BCS Crowns Alabama National Champions, Endorses Rick Santorum, Spits On World War II Veteran, Pushes Elderly Woman Down Flight Of Stairs, Wishes Osama Bin Laden Were Still Alive

    NEW ORLEANS—During a postgame ceremony Monday in which the Bowl Championship Series controversially awarded the Alabama Crimson Tide the 2012 NCAA championship trophy, the increasingly unpopular selection system proceeded to endorse Rick Santorum for president; spit on Samuel Carson, an 89-year-old World War II veteran holding the American flag for the ceremony; and then kick Carson's wife Rose down the stairs of the trophy-presentation platform.

    "As we present Alabama with the national championship—despite the fact that they just defeated a team that beat them in their home stadium earlier this season—we have only one regret: that our great friend, Osama bin Laden, could not be here to see this," the BCS's statement following the Sugar Bowl read in part. "Congratulations to the Crimson Tide football team. Also, the BCS hates blacks, Latinos, and Asians."

    "And gays," it continued. "We do, however, love the Taliban."

    In an announcement earlier this year that it would award the national championship to whichever team emerged victorious from the BCS Championship Game—blatantly neglecting worthy teams such as one-loss Oklahoma State—the BCS also called for tax increases on the working class, open-pit strip-mining in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, and the resumption of unrestricted whaling in the Pacific Ocean.

    Moreover, the BCS said it supports Sharia law, hopes everyone gets cancer, and considered awarding the national championship to Notre Dame just to see the look on everyone's "stupid, fat-fuck face."

    "Alabama, in achieving this victory against another SEC team from their own division, even though they did not even qualify for their own conference championship game, has shown they are true BCS champions," the organizer of five bowl matchups announced on its website Tuesday morning. "They deserve it more than anyone! Also, Adolph Hitler had some really good ideas."

    With many critics saying this season more than any other has highlighted the problems inherent in the bowl system, BCS officials claimed that kids should always be struck with leather belts if they get even slightly out of line, and that arguments will always be part of the culture of college football.

    "Debate over who 'deserves' the national championship will never die, unlike these tiny 2-day-old kittens I am crushing in my fists," BCS spokesman Charles Campbell said. "In a way, you can never really determine a national champion in college football any more than you can rape a woman who dresses in a short skirt and high heels. It just isn't realistically possible."

    Defenders of the current system point to the fact that the BCS computer has numerically proven Alabama is the undisputed national champion, as can be verified in detailed documents that also reportedly refute global climate change, provide a workable economic plan based on a national policy of child slavery, and outline a solution for global thermonuclear war that would allow what it called an "acceptable" survivability rate of 9 percent for the East Coast of North America.

    Still, anger and confusion over the BCS remain.

    "Naturally people have a right to be upset with what the BCS has done here, between its picking Alabama, declaring the era of Japanese internment to be a shining moment in American history, and saying James Earl Jones should be murdered execution-style," ESPN football analyst Kirk Herbstreit said. "At the very least, it's time to tweak the system again."

    "You have to admit," Herbstreit added, "any selection system that gives three-loss Wisconsin a top-10 ranking is absolutely detestable."

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    "[Desert Tider is] not appropriate at all, but everyone wasn't raised well." --BamaJan

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  • I liked this piece much better.

    Alabama Basketball Fans Taunting LSU Football

    SEC basketball games: Where SEC fans gather in the offseason to talk football. View and more funny pictures on SportsPickle

    http://www.sportspickle.com/picture/9440/alabama-basketball-fans-taunting-lsu-football-team

    This post was edited by RollBamaRoll 2 years ago

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  • Like most onion articles, the first paragraph makes me laugh. For years, after the first paragraph or two, the joke just gets old.

    "NEW ORLEANS—During a postgame ceremony Monday in which the Bowl Championship Series controversially awarded the Alabama Crimson Tide the 2012 NCAA championship trophy, the increasingly unpopular selection system proceeded to endorse Rick Santorum for president; spit on Samuel Carson, an 89-year-old World War II veteran holding the American flag for the ceremony; and then kick Carson's wife Rose down the stairs of the trophy-presentation platform."

    I'm for a playoff, so I laughed pretty hard at this. It's not really making fun of bama, just the system itself.

    This post was edited by Ashevillain 2 years ago

  • CrimsonStain

    Desert Tider said... (original post)

    I've always enjoyed The Onion, but this one missed the mark. Gotta be a young writer.

    Sports News Unpopular BCS Crowns Alabama National Champions, Endorses Rick Santorum, Spits On World War II Veteran, Pushes Elderly Woman Down Flight Of Stairs, Wishes Osama Bin Laden Were Still Alive

    NEW ORLEANS—During a postgame ceremony Monday in which the Bowl Championship Series controversially awarded the Alabama Crimson Tide the 2012 NCAA championship trophy, the increasingly unpopular selection system proceeded to endorse Rick Santorum for president; spit on Samuel Carson, an 89-year-old World War II veteran holding the American flag for the ceremony; and then kick Carson's wife Rose down the stairs of the trophy-presentation platform.

    "As we present Alabama with the national championship—despite the fact that they just defeated a team that beat them in their home stadium earlier this season—we have only one regret: that our great friend, Osama bin Laden, could not be here to see this," the BCS's statement following the Sugar Bowl read in part. "Congratulations to the Crimson Tide football team. Also, the BCS hates blacks, Latinos, and Asians."

    "And gays," it continued. "We do, however, love the Taliban."

    In an announcement earlier this year that it would award the national championship to whichever team emerged victorious from the BCS Championship Game—blatantly neglecting worthy teams such as one-loss Oklahoma State—the BCS also called for tax increases on the working class, open-pit strip-mining in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, and the resumption of unrestricted whaling in the Pacific Ocean.

    Moreover, the BCS said it supports Sharia law, hopes everyone gets cancer, and considered awarding the national championship to Notre Dame just to see the look on everyone's "stupid, fat-fuck face."

    "Alabama, in achieving this victory against another SEC team from their own division, even though they did not even qualify for their own conference championship game, has shown they are true BCS champions," the organizer of five bowl matchups announced on its website Tuesday morning. "They deserve it more than anyone! Also, Adolph Hitler had some really good ideas."

    With many critics saying this season more than any other has highlighted the problems inherent in the bowl system, BCS officials claimed that kids should always be struck with leather belts if they get even slightly out of line, and that arguments will always be part of the culture of college football.

    "Debate over who 'deserves' the national championship will never die, unlike these tiny 2-day-old kittens I am crushing in my fists," BCS spokesman Charles Campbell said. "In a way, you can never really determine a national champion in college football any more than you can rape a woman who dresses in a short skirt and high heels. It just isn't realistically possible."

    Defenders of the current system point to the fact that the BCS computer has numerically proven Alabama is the undisputed national champion, as can be verified in detailed documents that also reportedly refute global climate change, provide a workable economic plan based on a national policy of child slavery, and outline a solution for global thermonuclear war that would allow what it called an "acceptable" survivability rate of 9 percent for the East Coast of North America.

    Still, anger and confusion over the BCS remain.

    "Naturally people have a right to be upset with what the BCS has done here, between its picking Alabama, declaring the era of Japanese internment to be a shining moment in American history, and saying James Earl Jones should be murdered execution-style," ESPN football analyst Kirk Herbstreit said. "At the very least, it's time to tweak the system again."

    "You have to admit," Herbstreit added, "any selection system that gives three-loss Wisconsin a top-10 ranking is absolutely detestable."

    Thanks for posting, and yes I do appreciate The Onion for it's approach to abstract humor, but this one did miss the mark.

    “Although our intellect always longs for clarity and certainty, our nature often finds uncertainty fascinating.” Karl von Clausewitz

  • I used to love the Onion. First paragraph was funny as hell rest of the article sucked

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  • patrickricks said... (original post)

    Funny Stuff.....and yes alot of folks wont get it and call it stupid.

    Oh no I got it but UT was still stupid

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